22 December 02017: On Living In America During The First Part Of
The 21st Century, Again
So the U.S. Congress has punted--again--on funding the government
for a meaningful length of time and merely approved a continuing
resolution to keep the lights on through 19 January 02018.
As much as I find this practice repellent, I must admit that I like
the notion of the government shutting down on the first anniversary
of the last Inauguration Day.
I'm ordinarily one to obsess over minutiae, even in cases like
this where what MacDonough did made no difference in the end, and
I will continue to favor elevating the (a)vocation of
parliamentarian wherever possible.
M-->
14 December 02017 (Happy birthday yesterday and tomorrow!): The
World Chimes In
In the BillboardHoliday
100 list of the most popular holiday tunes, dated 23 December
02017*, I note that only two of my 80 "under the radar" tracks
appear. (#13 Christmas Eve/Sarajevo 12/24, which one
might reasonably expect, and #24 Christmastime is Here,
which is a little surprising.)
Proof of program, one might say.
M-->
*--That seems a little ahead of schedule, but it's probably a
holiday calendar quirk.
8 December 02017*: ACME-14/AVMX-8: An
Exercise In Box-Checking
In compiling this year’s collection of underappreciated holiday
tunes, I found myself thinking about all of the criteria and
subcategories of music that I've established, formally or
informally, over the years to build each set. So much so, in
fact, that I made it the organizing principle for 02017.
Here we go. (The entire collection, 80 tunes now including
this list, may be found here.)
One of my personal memory games is to try to list all of the songs
I've highlighted over the years when I’m far from the I’net.
It helps to be able to get the first song in any given list, as a
trigger to memory, so I try to start each year with something
fairly distinctive. This qualifies.
I've done several other states (California twice, Hawaii,
Nebraska, Nevada); it’s time for a local shoutout of sorts (Of
course, #1 this year is very much a local shoutout.). It
helps that this is a good song.
This title actually sounds like it could check the “recognize
other winter holidays” box–except that that’s really not what it’s
about, despite the title. This paean to political
correctness makes an appropriate mockery of that whole
mindset. It's from the album Codependent Christmas,
which seems to have the potential for all kinds of mischief.
A look at the full title of this one gives a second category, the
already-checked holiday comedy requirement: “(I’m Just A New
Year’s Adam Looking For A) New Year’s Eve”.
As someone born on New Year’s Adam, I’m forever in favor of
highlighting that phrase.
5. Born
On Christmas Day, Anna Marquardt. Criterion; A tip of the visor to winter more generally, as
well as another check of the "other winter holidays" box.
Speaking of birthdays...I like the line in here where Ms. M. notes
that on her upcoming 25 December birthday, she will "beat Jesus".
Consider that bar cleared. Dark comedy will always have a
place among the tunes of AVMX. Truth be told, of course,
there’s no need for this–the 12 days of Christmas fabled in song
(and possibly also story) are indeed the 12 days after
Christmas. But it’s different, funny, and underplayed–good
enough for me.
We hit this criterion in #7, but it's worth a second look.
It's hard to go wrong with the Rat Pack, provided they can meet
the other standards around here.
This is a different tune entirely, remaking the title of a song
that’s usually excellent without words and borderline-appalling
with them. If you've ever thought that "Walk on the Wild
Side" would work better re-arranged for the holidays, you were
right. If it'd been called "Santa's Off On A Sleigh Ride",
this tune would've qualified for AVMX membership; the title
conflict just adds to the pleasure of logging it in. The
Blenders have also committed the Xmas crime of recording "Sleigh
Ride" with the lyrics, making a YouTube search for this song an
exercise in dodging metaphorical land mines. Worth the
trouble, in my opinion.
Io Saturnalia!
M–>
*–Two days early, due to travel complications. Purists may
wish to wait until Sunday before listening in.
7 December 02017: (Part Of) The Year In
Synthetic Botany
I make it a point to photograph our Christmas trees every year,
even though you'd have to look very closely to see any differences
from year to year.
While I am not planning on posting shots of each tree this year,
there are a couple of changes that merit mention here.
1. The 02017 travel tree. Noteworthy primarily because we
painted two emergency backup living room walls green in order to
set this tree off a bit, which I think worked out pretty
well. (There are 14 new ornaments on the tree this
year--hey, it was a good year for traveling--but that's a
comparatively minor change).
2. My office tree, which doesn't go up every year, in part because
there's usually not a lot of time between T'giving and when the
students leave town. Most of the decorations, including the
tree skirt, came from a casino in Oklahoma via eBay. There
are a lot more ornaments in that lot, but the tree can only take
so many.
M-->
3 December 02017: The Year In Television
I have only two new thoughts about current TV; so let this stand as
a "year in review" kind of piece.
1. Due to the all-too-premature-in-my-mind cancellation* of Me,
Myself, and I, we live in a world where Todd Chrisley has two
shows in active production, and John Larroquette has one.
That sums up a lot of what's wrong with America, without resorting
to cheap political shots.
2. Jack Barry has to be spinning at insanely high RPM in his
grave, looking at what's happened to The Joker's Wild.
Seriously, someone should look into putting a turbine down there and
generating some electricity.
M-->
*--CBS says it's "on hiatus", but we all know what
that means.
30 November 02017: Sabbatical Update
Book #2--all 34 files of it--has been sent on to the
publisher. It should be published sometime next spring.
Mission accomplished.
M-->
28 November 02017 (Happy birthday!): Christmas Music 02017,
Part 1
Steve from Allen Park, MI was quick to notify
me when WNIC flipped to all-Christmas. (I was in Nevada when
it all happened.) I note that they restrained themselves
this year by not biting the holly* until 9 November. He has
also noted that terrestrial radio seems to do a better job than
Sirius/XM in playing holiday tunes people might actually
like. That's based on two satellite channels; things may
change as the rest come on line.
In other holiday tune news, the Little
Drummer Boy Challenge is now live, and has claimed its first
victim. I continue to be alive in the quest. Last year
I got taken down by my alarm clock, so there's something to change
this time around.
M-->
*--I kind of like the way this phrase (which, to be
honest, I made up as I typed) sounds, and I intend to use it as a
synonym for switching to ACATT radio going forward. It might
also serve in a more general setting to describe Christmas
activity that's too early.
21 November 02017 (22 years later*): Young Sheldon
Catch-up
Across the last three episodes of Young
Sheldon, there have been a few bright spots, but also a
couple of incidents that fall under the "too much throwback to TBBT"
heading. To wit:
1. Childhood bully Billy Sparks is apparently going to be a
recurring character. This only has potential if his
romancing of Missy Cooper continues to be a thing.
2. The most recent episode touched on the origins of adult
Sheldon's comic book obsession and his enjoyment of Red
Vines. A little too neatly, in my opinion. However, we
were spared (at least for the moment) a standoff between Red Vines
and Twizzlers, which is not nothing.
There's been some groundwork laid for George Sr.'s premature
death, which made for a pretty good episode. That said,
before he goes, I would very much like to see him fight a bobcat
for some licorice, as was mentioned in Mary Cooper's first
appearance on TBBT. I don't even care if he's
fighting the bobcat to retrieve the licorice, or if the candy is
merely a payoff for some unwise bet he made. Either one
would make for an amusing scene.
One can hope.
M-->
*--The calendars have synced up, so that November 21 is once again
the Tuesday before Thanksgiving, and so this remembrance of 01995
happens on the same day.
20 November 02017: 107 Casinos Later...
I have returned to Michigan, to Albion, and to
something approximating life as I know it. (Research doesn't
always take place in libraries. Yes, I kept a list.)
It's probably good to be back, although I haven't fully decided
that yet. A couple of notes on the trip:
1. I have visited two more states (Arkansas and Mississippi, in
that order), bringing my lifetime total to 47. The other
three (Alabama, Alaska, and Delaware) aren't connected, and so are
not going to be so easily knocked off.
2. Arkansas along I-40 looks an awful lot like Michigan along
I-94.
3. There are certain advantages to taking a sabbatical in the
desert. After a squall of rain mixed with snow in the
mountains east of Salt Lake City, Utah on 20 October, my life was
precipitation-free for four weeks, until I got to Findlay, on 18
November. I cannot say that I feel deprived by the lack of
rain and snow.
More to follow.
M-->
13 October 02017 (Happy birthday*!): An Autumn Hiatus
Starting next week, I will be away from my
office and thus unable to post here for a few weeks. I'll be
doing some field research in applied probability at several sites
in Nebraska, spending some time at the Center for Gaming Research
at UNLV, and then making my way
back to the Midwest along a southern route. At the end of it
all, my second book should be finished and a lot of groundwork
should be in place for book #3.
That said, I am again following in the spirit
of the ancient Internet tradition established by Leonardo Da Vinci
and carried down through the ages by Mark Evanier: posting a
picture of a can of Campbell's Cream of Mushroom Soup as a sign
that things will be static around here for some time. If
you're looking for online amusement during my absence, I recommend
Mark's site linked above.
M-->
*--And happy half-birthday, and happy 5/6-birthday.
5 October 02017*: Young Sheldon, 1x01
I've been following the development of Young
Sheldon fairly closely, and with 4 more weeks yet before
Episode 2 lands, it's time to put some thoughts into the ether and
see how far off I am at the end of it all.
I decided before the first episode dropped that the show needs to
avoid the pitfall of validating all of the minutiae that Big
Bang has created in its 10+-year run. A couple of
callbacks are fine, but there's a lot to be said for greater
separation from TBBT. Toward that end, here's what I
caught:
9-year-old Sheldon has a Stephen Hawking poster on his
bedroom wall. Okay--A Brief History of Time came
out in 01988, and the show is currently set in 01989.
Odd, but acceptable--if they don't overuse this.
Sheldon has perfect pitch. This came up once in TBBT
and was dropped. YS needs to do the same.
Childhood bully Billy Sparks made an appearance.
Said appearance was tied to Sheldon's fear of birds.
Again, these need to be one-offs. Two-offs at best.
On the other hand, the Cooper family house appears to be
different from the one we've seen in TBBT.
Probably a good thing. Maybe even a good start.
All that said, the notion of TBBT-Sheldon as an
unreliable narrator has some appeal.
On another front, there's a lot of story potential in Sheldon's
older brother--conveniently, story potential that doesn't
involve TBBT continuity. I hope they use
that. Especially his relationship with the father (who, if
continuity is going to be a thing [and here's a case where it
should], will die at some point in the first few seasons).
M-->
*--For the record, I was not in Las Vegas last
weekend, though I will be there in a couple of weeks for an
extended stay. Five people checked with me and Laurie to see
if we were okay.
28 September 02017: Whose Broad Stripes And Bright Stars?
Bob Costas has, to me, the best take on the recent
escalated-out-of-proportion madness.
M-->
24 September 02017: "A Foolish Old Person"
Those of us of a certain age really
ought not to have been confused by North Korea's state translator
hitting up his/her Korean-English thesaurus and pulling out
"dotard" to describe the President.
Television commercials for Webster's Thumb-Ease Dictionary
demonstrated the speedy indexing built into this little volume by
having a youngster (young punk, young whippersnapper--as your age
and politics may dictate) quickly finding that word as an older
gentlemen opined "probably doesn't even have it".
Wrong--and so we heard this definition from time to time in the
late 01970s and early 01980s.
For the record: I own a copy of this book--it was a prize in high
school, and it's followed me throughout all of my moves over these
many years. It does include "dotard" among its entries, and
it is indeed quick to look things up in it. One reason for
that is that the editors deliberately dropped lots of words such
as "it", "the", and the like that no one not a professional
etymologist ever bothers or needs to look up in a dictionary.
So the confusion of the past few days seems misplaced among my
agemates.
M-->
15 September 02017: Blast From The Past--On Multiple Levels
Part of the research for my current book
involves interlibrary loan. This occasionally leads to some
unexpected discoveries that won't make it into the book. One
recent one of those was this gem.
Time was, of course, when cards
like this were an essential part of library administration and
organization. While computers have rendered these things
pretty much obsolete, they don't all get pulled when systems
change over. (The card pockets aren't usually removed,
being glued in pretty firmly. This might be why some cards
survived, often holding down space right under computer bar
codes. That was the case here.)
This one tells a great story, or series of stories:
* This book (which was written in 01865;
this edition was published in 01949) apparently hadn't moved
for 40 years before I requested it, with the possible
exception of other ILL adventures not documented on this
card. The last recorded due date is in January
01977. (Given the title and subject matter, some
might say that that's no surprise. They may be right
about that.)
It's worth noting that the Date Due slip in the book records
its current trip to Albion but lists no other MelCat
check-outs, so I think I'm on safe ground with my original
unqualified statement.
* Looking at the signatures on the card,
it's very likely that I am the first man to check out this
book. Given that it is from the Marygrove College
library, which was a women's college until 01971, the "J.
Bennett" who checked it out in 01962 was almost certainly a
woman.
* Over half of the signatories on this card
were nuns. Again, the source library may be the reason
for that. Marygrove is a Catholic college with a
historically strong presence of faculty in religious life.
* The book spent some time--twice--on a
reserve list for Math 742. That was probably a
graduate-level course, but the current Marygrove catalog lists
no such class.
* Some of these people may no longer be
living, and may now be making their first appearance on the
I'net, which wasn't even remotely a thing when this card
mattered.
* Somewhat less fascinating, but still
interesting, is that Marygrove still uses the Dewey
Decimal System in its library. Most academic
libraries use Library
of Congress numbers.
Never a dull moment, as I say. Sometimes that's even a
positive thing.
M-->
10 September 02017: It's All Wallow's Eve
I suppose it's vaguely possible that the
current trio of Atlantic hurricanes might bump America's annual
re-obsession with 11 September 02001 off of cable TV, but I
suspect there are just too many channels out there for that to
happen.
Ah well.
As I said after last year's dysphoria: Perhaps we could leave the
remembrances in the hands of those directly affected for the next
four years instead of reliving the events o' the day, as was often
the case this (and every) year.
That still stands.
M-->
31 August 02017: Last Word On The Great American Eclipse
Steve from Allen Park, MI offers this
up, correctly, as a better example of eclipse-related
embarrassment. Another piece of evidence for the assertion
that common sense is anything but.
That said, I think The Guardian also had a pretty good take
on things, with this
piece called "Your underwhelming photos of the solar
eclipse". The picture of the eclipse reflected in a frying pan
isn't bad, though.
Norm invented the paint roller, which made my
weekend a lot easier than it could have been.
In the aftermath of a lot of home repair/remodeling, including the
removal of all that painted-over wallpaper on the first floor of
the home of The Markives,
Laurie and I spent the weekend splashing colors on accent walls
around the first floor of our northern domicile. The green
room (a/k/a "Hall of Nephices") is now the orange room, playing
off the stained glass. The emergency backup living room is
the new green room, in part to set off the ever-increasingly more
off-white Christmas tree that lives in there in December. The
dining room now has a purple wall to go with its curtains.
All that painting would have taken a lot longer without NB's
excellent invention.
Combined with the holdover colors on the second floor, it's like
living inside the Crayola 8-pack. In a good way.
M-->
24 July 02017 (Happy birthday!): A Tiny Amount Of Due Credit
It seems to me that when you rise to the top of
your profession, whatever that might be, you've earned the right
to have your name attached to your work, especially when it
receives more than the usual amount of public scrutiny.
When your life's work is as a parliamentarian, the "usual amount"
of public scrutiny is pretty close to zero. As a low-lying
parliamentarian* myself, I found it slightly dismaying that
coverage of a slightly significant procedural
matter in the U.S. Senate last week was frequently tagged as
coming "from the Senate parliamentarian", rather than from "Senate
parliamentarian Elizabeth MacDonough".
Read the article. This decision is almost always labeled as
coming from the office, not from an individual. I recognize
that this is probably not catastrophic, given the arcane rules and
deep traditions of the Senate, but this may have been Ms.
MacDonough's best chance to shine, and she's been denied credit
for her wisdom and her commitment to her job and her country.
M-->
*--Assistant parliamentarian of the Albion College faculty,
since 02012. One must start somewhere, plus it gives me
some meaningful experience to draw on as a Public Speaking merit
badge counselor.
10 July 02017 (T + 5): Happy Birthday!
9:28 AM: It's a boy! Henry Joseph Bollman, delivered
via C-section at about 7 AM. And the texters go wild.
8 pounds 8 ounces, 21.25 inches tall.
Fun fact: On this side of the Atlantic, today's date is a
palindrome (7/10/17)*. An auspicious way to start life.
Henry--At some point in the next 20 years or so, your mom will
probably point out to you, in a moment of stress, just how long it
took to get you into the world. If the Internet is still a
thing then, this Web page may be used as outside confirming
evidence that it ran about 36 hours. For that I
apologize. Perhaps by then you'll appreciate that that's
just something your quirky Uncle Mark--> does.
Welcome to the madness.
M-->
*--As is every day this month until the 19th, of
course, which does nothing to diminish the auspiciousness.
9 July 02017 (T + 4): Into Day Three
7:08 PM: While we've all been waiting, I have successfully
finished reading and marking up my next book, so the time has been
well-spent. (I've also eaten a lot of ice chips, which may or
may not be interpreted as a gesture of solidarity.) Editing
the LATEX code comes next.
6;43 PM: We now have a new group text established. The
21st century does not lack for amusing technological puzzles.
5:20 PM: As the wait continues, Eric is now spreading his
newfound avian knowledge to Laura via a group text.
Laura appears not to be amused.
11:51 AM: Okay, so the birthday match we were hoping for
didn't happen. On the other hand, there's been a texted
development or two:
1. Eric's understanding of matters avian has increased. Except
maybe in the case of Dumbo.
2. More importantly, we have this news from Steven:
Water broke around 8. And contractions
have been pretty consistent every few minutes. [Robyn] is
napping now.
Further medical details redacted. I'm impressed with
Robyn's ability to nap amidst all this.
It sounds like we're pretty close to go time.
M-->
8 July 02017 (Happy birthday! and T + 3): The Watch Continues
The birthday message right now is for Monica 1, but could be
doubled if something happens in the next 11.5 hours. Out here
in 269-land, we're kind of rooting for that kind of birthday
synchrony.
M-->
7 July 02017 (T + 2): A Live Start To The Action
4:35 PM: And so it begins. First text, from Steven:
Just a heads up. We are heading to the
hospital tonight to start the inducing process. I will
keep you posted as things progress.
This update source will have to go merely
plausibly live at some point, but I'll do my best to capture
things as they happened and preserve them.
6:08 PM: And so it pauses. Again from Steven:
Looks like we got bumped for
tonight. Fingers crossed for tomorrow!
The text trail after that included a suggestion that he give
Robyn some wine, which cannot be a bad idea at this point.
7:08 PM: It's a long pause:
Didn't even make it to the
hospital. We got called off. I'll keep you
posted tomorrow.
M-->
5 July 02017 (T +/- 0): Dodeca Watch--A Milestone
As the countdown numbers switch from red to black, a curious kind of
limbo arises.
M-->
3 July 02017 (T - 2): Running In Place, Yet Falling Behind
One thing about the 24/7/365.24 news cycle that
the 21st century has brought us is that if you detach from the
news for a week or so, whether voluntarily (as I did last fall) or
involuntarily (as I did last week), it's possible for a story to
break, evolve, and die off while you miss its entire life.
Such was the case last week. While I was running around the
woods with limited I'net and email access*, the academic world
(among others, no doubt) was up in arms about a nascent TSA
program requiring air travelers to remove books from their
carry-on luggage for special inspection at the security
checkpoint.
With one trip to Las Vegas, I could have singlehandedly put a big
dent in this bad idea. Either that, or guaranteed my
addition to a lot of TSA watch lists**. In my continuing
quest to move a lot of the Gambler's
Book Club stock*** to Michigan, I frequently board the plane
at McCarran Airport with a lot more books than I came to town
with. If the TSA employees had to look through every page of
every volume in search of--well, I don't know what they think
they'd find--the backup would be enough to cause some public
outcry.
I won't hide a razor blade in a copy of The Gambling Times
Guide To European & Asian Games. So let it be
written and all that.
M-->
*--But better cell phone and texting service than
I have here in my office.
**--More likely that, truth be known.
***--Except for the poker books. There are very much a lot
of those, and plus also my interest in them is minimal.
16 June 02017 (T - 19): Context Is Key
In the news recently was the tale of a
two-headed porpoise caught by some Dutch fishermen. This
article sums up the levels of anomalous biology represented
by this creature, which is interesting in its own right.
What I found amusing was the tagline on this item in today's news
update from the Denver Post, which solemnly informed
readers that 2 "is a 100% increase from the normal number of heads
porpoises have".
Way to go the extra mile (high), folks.
M-->
30 May 02017 (T - 36): A Day Of Notes
1. In the coverage of Frank
Deford's passing yesterday and today, there's been little to
no mention of what I consider to be among his very best writing: Five
Strides on the Banked Track, his book about Roller Derby.
Tragic. That was an impressive piece of work. I am
something of a Roller Derby aficionado, especially the
pre-inline-skate days, in no small part due to that book.
2. Today is Anguilla Day, marking the 50th anniversary of Anguilla
breaking away from St. Kitts and Nevis and becoming, well,
differently non-independent. The Brexit fiasco aside, this was
probably a pretty wise choice.
We spent far too little time on Anguilla last summer. Laurie's
praise for their bacon, pineapple, and plantain pizza alone demands
a return visit. This scenery (including the site of an obscure
reality TV show, Coupled)
makes an equal argument.
3. About that countdown: We're tracking the
days until Robyn and Steven's kid is due to arrive. In the
family tradition of "Scout" and "Spud", I've assigned this child
the temporary local nickname "Dodeca", in light of her/his
status as Laurie's and my 12th nephice. The name trips off
the tongue well, has a nice Greek etymology, and is
appropriately epicene. July 5 is marked on my summer
calendar as "Dodeca Due Date", which is also kind of fun to say.
M-->
26 May 02017: Today's Fun Fact
It takes approximately 39 billion standard
metal BBs to fill an Olympic-sized swimming pool.
Why did I spend a few minutes yesterday calculating this?
It's like this: There are 6 US states currently without a state
lottery. One of them is Mississippi, which announced
yesterday the formation of a group to study lotteries in
adjoining states, although not to make a recommendation one way or
the other. Among the predictable religious objection, which
runs strong in three of the non-lottery states (Alabama and Utah
as well as Mississippi), was this gem:
“It’s almost like having an Olympic-size swimming pool and
buying enough BB’s to fill up the swimming pool, paint one of
them red, put them in the pool and mix it up and then charge
people $2 to reach in and try to find the red BB in the Olympic
swimming pool,” Perkins said. “That’s how futile it is and
that’s how useless it is to depend on a lottery or any form of
gambling to support your family.”
That's a checkable assertion. Using the standard dimensions
of an Olympic pool and of a metal BB, together with the fact that
closely-packed spheres take up about 74% of available space, I got
about 38,773,549,922 for the count of that collection of
BBs. Meanwhile, the odds of winning the top prize at Powerball are "only" 1 in
292,201,338, which is about 133 times more likely than finding
that elusive red BB.
Nice try. And yes, this calculation will be in the next
book.
M-->
5 May 02017 (Happy birthday!): A Speck Of Gold In The Darkness
In a week with depressing political news seemingly around every
corner, something happened that cheered me greatly:
My opinion of Santa Fe, already decently
high, just zoomed upward. I recognize the perils involved
in overconsumption of sugar, but this kind of heavy-handed
approach is not the way to encourage healthful drinking.
I've been to S.F. a couple of times, when I've been attending
conferences in New Mexico. Nice city, although if you're
not especially interested in either art or Native American
culture--preferably both, truth be told--there's a lot less to
draw one in. I have usually settled for enjoying the
spectacular scenery. Laurie and I are planning a Western
vacation for this summer which was already going to include a
night or two there, and this clinches the deal. I'll be
raising a root beer or something similar in tribute to this
outbreak of good sense.
M-->
27 April 20017: The Truth, Revealed
I've been following the Brexit silliness fairly
closely, to the extent of signing up for a daily email on
developments across the way. In today's installment, we
learned that one
thing motivating one of the principals is the possibility of
opening up the American market for...haggis.
Combine that with a free trade agreement to open up India for
whiskey sales...why, the disruption in Europe on GB's way out
seems to sink to the level of "necessary collateral damage".
While I suspect that none of us will be lining up for a McHaggis
or its equivalent anytime soon, it's nice that the world continues
to amuse over there, even as things on this side seem less funny
each day.
M-->
24 April 02017: Coffee Talk (without Linda Richman)
There are some developments that just sort of creep up on you, and
you don't notice them without some specific trigger. This
weekend has brought me one of those.
My tastes in beverages run far more toward the
cold than the hot. I drink neither coffee nor tea, and only
the very occasional hot chocolate. I'm in the other thermal
direction and have been known, fairly frequently, to order extra
ice in a restaurant. With today's temporary* unveiling of a
Keurig beverage machine in the lounge here at the workplace of The Markives, I've been
thinking a little more than usual about hot beverages. Which
led to a realization that lacks an explanation:
There are nineteen** coffee cups on
my desk at work.
Some of these come from thrift stores (a
radio station mug and a couple of casino souvenir cups), but I
can certify that the majority have never had coffee in
them. One is full of paper clips, and one holds binder
clips. One has a lacrosse ball in it, for some
even-more-inexplicable reason. One is full of golf
balls***, which at least makes a little sense. Most of
the rest hold various writing implements, with one devoted to
red pens and one full of mechanical pencils that have come my
way.
In a count of non-coffee cup drinking vessels on my desk,
there are also a couple of hot/cold insulated cups, a Dixie
cup full of chalk holders**** and the one glass I drink from.
M-->
*--Temporary because it leaked hot water, and rather
spectacularly. We'll try again tomorrow.
**--Somehow the word seems more striking than the
digits.
***--Of different and mathematically interesting dimple
patterns, which is why they're here.
****--Another phrase appearing on the I'net for the first
time here.
15 April 02017: I'm Back; Start The Countdown
So today is Easter. Next year, Easter
falls on April 1.
This seems to have immense sketch comedy possibilities involving
the apostle Thomas.
The last time that happened was 01956. Barring a change in
how the day is determined, which I suggested a while back (The Markives, 22 March
02008), and which some high-level Christian officials are discussing,
the next time will be 02029, so such comedy might have a second
life within a reasonable chunk of time.
M-->
12 March 02017: Directional Basketball
What does the NCAA have against the direction
"North"?
Take a look at the names of the regionals for the D-I basketball
tournament: East, West, South, and...Midwest.
Why? Not that I have anything against "Midwest", but what's
wrong with North?
And speaking of compass points: Any coverage of Northwestern's
first-ever NCAA tournament bid that doesn't include a mention of
the fact that the first tournament was held on the NU campus is
missing an important part of the story.
M-->
11 March 02017 (Happy birthday!): Travel Note
If you ever see Absinthe at Caesars
Palace in Las Vegas, bring a seat cushion. The show was
terrific* (there were, among other performances, things done on
roller skates that come right. up. to. the. edge. of the laws of
physics), but the tent is equipped with random wooden folding
chairs, one of which was the most uncomfortable chair in which
I've ever sat.
But entirely worth it. Thanks to Kristine Z. for suggesting
that show.
M-->
*--For the iron-eared, about which we were indeed warned.
3 March 02017 (Happy birthday!*): Fire Up The Flux Capacitor
I've been thinking a lot (more than is healthy,
truth be told) recently about the scene in Back to the Future
where Marty McFly tells Doc Brown that the U.S. President in 01985
is Ronald Reagan, which comes as rather a surprise to anyone who
knew of Reagan only up until October 01955.
I'd really like to time-travel back to 01987 and try that
experiment with today's President and a few random citizens.
I suspect the response would be equally incredulous. A
"high-profile and frequently clownish real estate tycoon from New
York" as the leader of the free world? No less unbelievable
than a grade-B movie actor, from where I sit.
(I might want to pass along a few other messages, but right now
the President thing is at the top of my "to have done" list.)
M-->
*--Birthweek, technically, according to standard procedure in
EL.
14 February 02017: Always Look On The Bright Side, Even On A
Cloudy Winter Day
In the ongoing quest to look for good wherever it might be found, no
matter how challenging that might be:
Half-Price Candy Tomorrow!
This celebration is also appropriate for November 1, December 26,
and whatever the day after Easter happens to be in any given year.
M-->
29 January 02017: Comedy Really Is All
About Timing...Not That There Was Any Doubt
I am a fan of political comedy, and particularly enjoy the work of
the Capitol Steps.
Their most recent album, What To Expect When You're Electing,
probably maintains their high standard, both for insightful
commentary and good humor.
I say "probably" because listening to it during the runup to or the
first week of the current administration pretty much constitutes the
textbook definition of "bad timing". This was probably funny
when released, about 6 months ago. It might be funny a year
from now, and will almost certainly be funny, though wildly dated*,
in five years.
But not now. The prevailing attitude at the time of recording,
as in America as a whole, was that the current President was
unelectable. As for that matter, were a lot of the candidates
on both sides of the ballot--but he's the only one who matters now.
To hear what was being said back then and see what's happening now
makes the events of last 8 November even more unsettling.
M-->
*--As Mark Russell
so eloquently put it, "Topical songs don't last too long;
eventually they're only good for wrapping grapefruit rinds or
coffee grounds."
20 January 02017, 10:37:14 AM EST: As The
Guard Changes
The sun came up this morning.
According to best estimates, the probability that the sun will
come up tomorrow morning is approximately
1,826,200,000,020/1,826,200,000,021. That would be (# of
days on which the sun has come up until today) divided by (# of
days that the sun has come up until today, + 1).
The title up there may become my new mantra, or
maybe a new addition to my email signature block. It comes
from a recent post over at writer Mark Evanier's blog, News From ME, which is an
excellent source of entertaining tidbits about a lot of things
that I enjoy.
At a time when "the fascism of absolute freedom, where everybody
has an opinion, and everybody's absolutely unbending on that
opinion" that Dennis Miller spoke of seems to be more and more the
new normal, the idea of occasional detachment seems a lot more
attractive and a lot less irresponsible than usual.
Click the photo to return to the Bollman
family main page.
The
opinions
expressed in this page/section are strictly those of the
page's author. The contents of this page have not been
reviewed or approved by Albion College.
The Markives for 02017
Those of us of a certain age really
ought not to have been confused by North Korea's state translator
hitting up his/her Korean-English thesaurus and pulling out
"dotard" to describe the President.
Time was, of course, when cards
like this were an essential part of library administration and
organization. While computers have rendered these things
pretty much obsolete, they don't all get pulled when systems
change over. (The card pockets aren't usually removed,
being glued in pretty firmly. This might be why some cards
survived, often holding down space right under computer bar
codes. That was the case here.)
